Abby

Oh the dealings with Abby just don't seem to get any easier.

Woke up on August 1st and was sick, throwing up and blood sugar dropping quickly. I called the Doctor and they said to head to the hospital. We got there and started her on IV fluids and gave her sugars. Her Ketones were high and sugar was low. Her heart rate was fast and her body was done fighting. They decided to admit us and watch her over night, which seems to be what always happens. She is not stable enough to bring home. We stayed for 2 days and during that time she had an X-ray, lots of blood drawn to try to pinpoint the reason it keeps happening. No luck on any test results. She had some rather frightening rectal bleeding while we were there that no one could find a reason for. A week later, all blood results are within normal ranges for the most part.

Then on August 19th, Abby came downstairs and collapsed on the kitchen floor. She was not responding to me and when she would try to open her eyes, they would roll back in her head. I took her blood sugar and it was 38. I moved her to the couch and immediately went into the kitchen to find anything with sugar in it. Abby was awake but not moving or talking to me at this point, so I gave her a Popsicle and a piece of candy to suck on and a glass of Gatorade. I put a call in to the Doctor in which they called back within minutes. The Doctor expressed her concerns with this happening so closely and seems to be getting worse. She wanted to call some Endo docs and see what they wanted to do and call me back. While I was waiting, I got her blood sugar up to 50. At this point she began to throw up. In between throwing up I was still giving sugars to try to maintain her.

The Doctor called back again and said a team of Endocrinologist were waiting for her at the Children's hospital and to head there.

The Endo docs basically said our best chance at treating this is to do preventative measures. I got 2 machines to test her with at home. Her blood ketones, and her blood sugars. We also have to give her 5Tbs or raw corn starch at night before bed. We found the best way to do this is to mix it with Chocolate milk. We have narrowed it down to the part of her body failing her. While she is sleeping her body tries to maintain her blood sugars by grabbing onto her stored sugars and carbs from previous meals. Well Abby's body does not store any...so it starts breaking down other things it is not supposed to. Which in turn makes her body produce Ketones, after so many produce her body goes into ketoacidosis. Well the Ketoacidosis makes her throw up. So all this time we were thinking she was getting a virus and it was making her throw up and drop her blood sugars, when actually she is dropping those sugars at night and by the time she is waking up she is already in the Ketoacidosis phase and that is making her throw up. So we had it all backwards.

Now that we better understand what her body is doing, we are doing our best to prevent it from happening. The Raw corn starch releases slow amounts of carbs into her body through the night and allows her to maintain a semi steady stream of blood sugar. This has proven to be effective so far. We have had only 2 days of low blood sugar and 2 days of Ketones in her blood in the last 11 days or so.

For me though, I don't feel like it is good enough. I want to know what is causing it, and what long term effects it will have, and how long it will last. The Endo docs said there is 500 metabolic disorders it can be and testing can for all these can be exhausting. Their biggest concern is Abby slipping into a coma while she is sleeping from low blood sugar and us not knowing.

Abby has since started losing her hair, she has 3 balding spots on the top of her head and no one can tell us why. I just feel in my heart there is something more that is being over looked or missed.

I just wish we had a better answer.

My Best Friend...

Is getting married!!!!

I am beyond thrilled for her, maybe even a little too much so. She asked me to be her Maid of honor and I am so excited. I am sad I am so far away from her right now though, I want to be there for all the little events, trying on dresses, looking at venues etc. I wish I could be there to see her beautiful face when she finds the perfect dress and just knows it, that moment will stay with you forever, I want to calm her through the frustrating things that will pop up throughout this planning period (that you are dreading). I would want nothing more than to be right next to her and support her and give her everything she needs.

What an exciting time this is.

Most importantly I would tell her all the details will fall into place and although it may seem like forever away it will be here before she knows it and , the most important part of this whole thing is marrying the man of your dreams. Going to bed every night and knowing you are with your Best Friend (I know I am not numero uno anymore and that is ok with me), sharing your day, your dreams, and knowing he will be there and do anything for you. Spending your days forever with the one you love is a feeling that can never be taken from you.

The path to a dream is paved with sacrifices and lined with determination, and although it has many stumbling blocks along the way and, may go in more than one direction, it is marked with Faith. It is traveled by belief and courage, persistence and hard work. It is conquered with a willingness to face challenges and take chances, to fail and try again, and again. Along the way, you may have to confront doubts, setbacks, and unfairness. But when the path comes to an end, you will find that there is no greater joy than making your dreams comes true.

Heather, My heart is filled with such love for you and David it is crazy. He treats you like I would wish he would, he gives you what I would hope and pray for you to have, he loves you like I would want you to be loved. You have changed so much since being with David and I can honestly say it is all good changes. My eyes fill with tears even as I write this cause I am so incredibly happy and proud of you (and cause I'm emotional). I love you so much, and wish nothing but wonderful things for you. You have been there for me for everything, and I know I could call you at anytime and say I needed you and you would be there, even from far away. I know you also know I would do the same for you.

I miss you!!

Another trip

I just returned from a very long and much needed trip to FL. The girls and I packed up the car and just left...all decided within a couple hours.

Our life has been anything BUT normal since moving here. Starting with my pregnancy, moving at 32 weeks. The complications that arose from that, starting with Sophia's NICU, trouble breathing, blood sugars, high CBC, 2 days of antibiotics, heart murmur. Then on to me, stroke in my eye, incision coming open. After returning home being very ill, having to go back in for IV fluids, then being dropped off on Christmas day alone at an ER while Nick came home with the 3 girls, blood pressure sky high, I was given pain med after pain med, my sister talking me though everything they were doing and ordering. Then being given a combination of meds to take the next week together, only to find out later (after not waking for 2 days) that those 2 meds should never be taken together and could be lethal.

April this year Abby got sick and had to be hospitalized and was diagnosed recently with Ketotic hypoglycemia, I am thankful it was not some of the more permanent things they were discussing, but none the less something that still needs to be monitored carefully, and could potentially be very dangerous.

Bella has had some very private things happen and she is now in counseling. Things that have rocked our family so hard we are unsure some days how to cope.

Sophia needs her eye surgery, which hopefully will be simple.

2 Fridays ago our dog scooter got sick, he was acting all funny and crying and not eating. I took him to the vet and they did some x-rays and see all these masses in his intestines that she believed to be cloth. He needed emergency surgery now and would not live 12 to 24 more hours. She gave us the option to put him to sleep, heavily sedate him and let him die at home or do this surgery. They surgery quote went up to 1900.00 dollars. Then he needed after care at an Animal Hospital which was going to be anywhere from 600 to 900 dollars. Just insane. We obviously did the surgery, we had the money and Scooter is not just a dog to us, but a family member. The girls would be devastated if anything happened to him. So they do they surgery and he ate a freakin bib...a whole bib...he chewed it and everything. Guess I now know where that one went. The cloth was acting as a barrier in his intestines not letting anything pass. He only weighs 7lbs so there was no way that thing was going anywhere. The worse part was she saved it for me to see...puke.

Nick goes to work the next Monday and was fired. Need I even say more. We uplifted our whole family for this company, the hell we have been through since living here. Nick had given every ounce of his being to this company. He on several occasions put this company ahead of our own family. He gave his heart and soul into everything he did. Our family and this Company Nick protected, their best interest was always put ahead and thought of before decisions were made. Then to fire him? Going on 9 years. Moving our family here, the sacrifices, personal and financial we made. The stress and pressure our marriage has endured since moving here are insurmountable. What our little girls have been through is not even fair. How could anyone treat someone like this. Seriously? I would not wish what we have been dealt on my worse enemy. The things we have been tested with.

SO I left, I packed up the girls and started driving on Tuesday June 30th and got to FL on Wed July 1st. I just had to get out of this house, out of this city.

Nick stayed behind with his mom. He had lots of things to take care of, and running away is not really his forte like mine is apparently :) While we were gone his mom fell in our laundry room and broke her wrist in 2 places I guess and needs surgery...tomorrow actually. Will this end.

I got back this Sunday July 12th in the wee house of the morning.

The girls were incredible on our little journey, they really were the best little travelers I could have ever asked for.

Now I am home and trying to get back to our new normal. Whatever that may be, I guess we will figure it out. We are going to be OK and we are not moving back to FL, we are holding on tight and trying our best to hold it together.

Sophias eye surgery scheduled.

For July 17th, it should be a simple procedure. They are probing her eye and cutting away scar tissue and cartlidge. If there is a problem and it is still not draining properly they will put a little tube in place that will run through her and eye and out her nose allowing drainage for 6 weeks to 6 months. I hope and pray she will have the simpler part of this procedure, for all things in my life right now that need to be normal I need this to go smoothly. For her own recovery she needs this.

Happy 4th Birthday Abby

Oh sweet Abby girl. I can't believe how the time has flown since the day you were born. What a little lady you have become, and such a sparkly one too. The things you say and do every day are so entertaining. Your sense of humor, your jokes, and that contagious laugh you have...oh how I love that laugh, so hearty and deep.

You amaze me and daddy everyday.

We love you sweet baby!

Happy Fathers Day!!

To the most amazing, dedicated, loving, caring father anyone could ask for.

You amaze me every day. The girls have your heart and their hearts are yours. I can't wait to see how your relationships strengthen as you grow together with our daughters. I know they will run to you when Mommy says no, kinda like they do now. I know they will want your protection at times and at other times I am sure they will think you are too strict and need to lighten up. They will probably not like either of us at some point in teen hood, but will always remember when you used to fly them to bed, the tickle monster, the synopsis on sports for each season, the never ending hugs and kisses, the little jokes we have, and the dates every month with special one on one daddy time. These are memories you are instilling in them, memories they will always have, moments of happiness.

Thank you, for being the father you are, the daddy-o, the play time super-hero. We love you.

Memorial weekend trip to Atlanta...

Oh what fun we had.

It started out with an 8hr and 45 min car ride by myself to get there. It was pure bliss, seriously just me, Nicks car and an ipod. Wonderful. I have never taken off on my own this far and was a little apprehensive at first. This was a huge deal for me to do, it took alot of talking myself in to. Nick and I have always been together when we have traveled, and he has always been the one behind the wheel. I hate driving in unfamiliar places, and navigating my way around traffic in places I am not confident, now I am so confident, knowing I could drive a long distance by myself and actually find my way and not be scared.

Ok, so my actual purpose of driving to Atlanta was my cousin Patrick's wedding. My little sis Cris, and my BFF Heather were also meeting me there. They were driving up from FL and I was driving down from MO. Talk about excited, I was like a little kid in a candy store.

We all woke up very tired Saturday morning...not naming any names...but some of us didn't want to wake up at all *ahem*

We had breakfast and IHOP, which was not the easiest to find. We had the best server that any of us admittedly have ever had, he was so much fun, and I even asked if he could come home with me...jokingly of course, and he responded maybe a little to seriously with a yeah.

After breakfast we took a ride over to Urgent care, and deciding heather was in fact going to live, so we continued our day.

Saturday night we planned for dinner and drinks at Bahama Breeze, where I ate way too much. So yummy. My cousins met up with us and had some drinks and talked.

There was this *older* lady that was hilarious. She had no reservations about getting out on the dance floor. She was a little tipsy. She was very energetic. She was a little annoying to other guests, and was the topic of quite a few laughs...except Heather, she felt sorry for her. Anyway, here she is in the pink. At some point she got a hold of someones Boa and was wrapping it around random peoples necks and doing a semi dance for them...picture that.

Sunday was the wedding. It was in the afternoon and was a tad bit hot, reception following. The people making/preparing the food were a tidge questionable, so Heather, Cris and I skipped on that one, with a long ride of travel ahead of us for the next day, a stomach bug was the last thing we needed.

All in all a fantastic trip. I miss my BFF Heather, that was the first time we have seen each other in 8 months. Hopefully with her Brothers wedding and our trip were planning for Thanksgiving we will get together sooner.