Freezing in October

Oh, it is so cold here right now. The high today is 49. This is so weird to me to be cold at this time of year. I knew it was going to be getting cold soon, but I feel like we totally skipped the fall weather, or maybe this is fall weather :) not sure about that one. I have been reading that this will be a very cold and snowy winter. The girls will love that for sure. I got out all the scarves, gloves, hats, snow boots etc. from last year. Unfortunately, they no longer fit who they are supposed to fit, so a winter shopping trip is in our very near future.

I had the craziest, busiest day yesterday and had some thoughts that totally caught me off guard. I was non stop yesterday from the time my feet hit the floor. I was hope for maybe 30min total the entire day till 8pm and when I laid down last night thinking of how tired I was, I missed Sophia like crazy. I didn't get to hold her but for a few min, in between passing her off to other people (Mops, mimi, laying her down for a nap so I could run back out the door to take Abby to the doctor) and I was so sad that I didn't play with her at all yesterday, didn't get to see if she could take 5 steps instead of 4, didn't get to kiss her as much as usual, didn't cuddle with her, didn't lay on the floor while she climbed all over me. I know this is not the normal day for us, so not like it will be happening again soon, but still. I really truly missed her. SO much so, that I got my tired, exhausted, aching body out of bed and walked into her room so I could see her sleeping so peacefully one last time before I closed my own eyes. I was really surprised I felt this way after only a day of crazy chaos. I did vow to really and truly revel in her squishy, sweet babyness since this will be our last baby, so maybe missing a day of her set that off.

I have been busy making the girls Halloween costumes and they will be ready soon. I am so excited to have accomplished this and before the deadline.

Bella is doing so awesome in school and I am so proud of her, she is working so hard and it is showing in all her work. Our parent/teacher conference was awesome and she has all A's and 1 B. She loves Math, and Reading the most. She loves going to school and really looks up to the Teachers and staff there. I could not be more proud or happy for her. I think how fortunate we are to not be dealing with any issues with school work right now, or her hating to go to school, or just not applying herself how she should. I know there are many children who struggle with this and for that I am thankful.

Abby is still Abby. She has good days, bad days. She is my little strong minded, my way or no way child. She likes to put together puzzles, play hide and seek, her favorite number is 4 cause that's how old she is and will tell you in a minute, she also thinks she needs 4 of everything. Abby showed her very strong willed self off at the bust stop this morning. 30 something degrees outside 7am standing on the street corner with neighbors, Abby decides to take off the white jacket I gave her, throw it on the wet ground and proceed to stand there and scream about how cold she is while wearing a Miami Dolphins cheerleading outfit (and not the Midwest possibly warm version) I am talking the tank top/skirt version, while holding an umbrella and refusing to put the jacket back on. How hard is it to behave for 4min while we walk Bella to the bus stop. We have been talking and praying for the homeless adults and children lately at night and Abby is especially concerned for them. Asking how they eat, where they sleep, why they don't have a house, etc. So yesterday Abby decides she will ask Santa to bring her a Dora tent, with a blanket and pillow and she will give it to the kids who sleep outside so they can have a house. Then she goes "dat work mama right? Dose kids will weally like that huh?" She is so sweet and caring, when you catch her at the right time :)

Sophia is taking steps, and she has 2 teeth that are starting to come in...finally. Bella and Abby both got their first teeth at 6m and Soph just wants to take it at her own pace. She is all over the place, crawling, pulling up, taking a few steps before falling back, or sometimes forward. I was hoping she would not walk for a while longer and would stay little forever and ever, but I know that is not happening, plus with her bug sisters walking all around her, I knew it would be no time before she figured it out. Still taking 2 naps for the most part of a normal day. Sleeping through the night most of the time. Eating like crazy and just being happy and smiley and giving lots of kisses and raspberries to most people.

Family...

It is so hard to find any pictures of us all together.

The days pass quickly, the months fly by and the years seem to pass with the blink of an eye.

I know all too soon, our girls will be young ladies, they will be independent and on their own and Nick and I will look back and wonder where the time went.

They will be strong women, who stand up for who and what they believe in.

We will give them every bit of knowledge we have and teach them to learn from every mistake made.

They will have learned to love each other and will have close relationships with one another.

They will not be afraid to love and be loved.

Best of all, Nick and I will have taught them, raised them, loved them.

Abby and the great Soccer adventure.

Seeing Abby play soccer is so fun for Nick and I. The best part is she is wearing shorts and a shirt, which never...and I mean never happens. She looks so freakin cute in her shorts and shin guards and her hair pulled back. She plays her little heart out. She runs after the ball and focuses so hard on getting it through the goal.

Can't you just see the determination in her eyes.

The focus of this girl, I tell ya!

Abby wants to be a chicken, Abby wants to be a duck...quack, quack, quack...

Ok, now were getting there baby. Go Abby go!!

You amaze us everyday Abby, and we could not be more proud of you.

She takes many breaks for a drink, but she needs the sugar while she is running for 1 hour non stop, so we don't say anything about that to her, and her coach understands she needs it.

Now I would not say she is without her moments of not paying attention, because clearly she is, but at 4, I think she has done incredible.

Isabella at 3 years old

Having a moment of looking back at when you were 3. So cute and fun.

Sophia 8 months

What a sweet baby you are. 20lbs 27in long and the fattest little thighs I have seen. You have started to army crawl, you are hesitant to go from sitting to crawling as I think you feel you will tip over and face plant on the rug...which has happened so the feeling is valid. You say "daddadadadadadada" but no sign of mama yet. You babble and squeal. You love peek a boo, patty cake, and "Sophie come out and play with me" You will flail those little arms at any sign of that song.

You are sleeping through the night and have been for some time now. You take 2 naps, one about 2 to 3 hours after you wake up and then another in the later afternoon for about 45min. You are a creature of comfort and love routine. You will only sleep in your crib and on 2 occasions have you fallen asleep elsewhere. Daddy says you fell asleep on his chest once a few months ago, but until I see proof we will count the 2 times you slept on the floor in the middle of playing. You have not been much of a sleeper on other people. You like and want your own space when sleeping and I can't blame you *ahem bella and abby, you hear that...mommy want her own space*

You smile at everyone especially men. You have a thing for their voices I would like to believe. You are so much fun and I am thankful everyday to have you as our daughter, to be blessed with such an easy going little girl, that just loves to have someone look at her and smile.

I love you soph, pebbles, nana, fifi.

Happy Birthday yaya!!

I wish I was there to wish you a Happy Birthday in person, to give you a card and gift with my hands, to hug you super tight...cause I know you like that best haha. Being far away is so hard when Birthday's and Holidays come around. I would want nothing more than to be there with you today to celebratate your 28th.

I love you Yaya.

Abby

Oh the dealings with Abby just don't seem to get any easier.

Woke up on August 1st and was sick, throwing up and blood sugar dropping quickly. I called the Doctor and they said to head to the hospital. We got there and started her on IV fluids and gave her sugars. Her Ketones were high and sugar was low. Her heart rate was fast and her body was done fighting. They decided to admit us and watch her over night, which seems to be what always happens. She is not stable enough to bring home. We stayed for 2 days and during that time she had an X-ray, lots of blood drawn to try to pinpoint the reason it keeps happening. No luck on any test results. She had some rather frightening rectal bleeding while we were there that no one could find a reason for. A week later, all blood results are within normal ranges for the most part.

Then on August 19th, Abby came downstairs and collapsed on the kitchen floor. She was not responding to me and when she would try to open her eyes, they would roll back in her head. I took her blood sugar and it was 38. I moved her to the couch and immediately went into the kitchen to find anything with sugar in it. Abby was awake but not moving or talking to me at this point, so I gave her a Popsicle and a piece of candy to suck on and a glass of Gatorade. I put a call in to the Doctor in which they called back within minutes. The Doctor expressed her concerns with this happening so closely and seems to be getting worse. She wanted to call some Endo docs and see what they wanted to do and call me back. While I was waiting, I got her blood sugar up to 50. At this point she began to throw up. In between throwing up I was still giving sugars to try to maintain her.

The Doctor called back again and said a team of Endocrinologist were waiting for her at the Children's hospital and to head there.

The Endo docs basically said our best chance at treating this is to do preventative measures. I got 2 machines to test her with at home. Her blood ketones, and her blood sugars. We also have to give her 5Tbs or raw corn starch at night before bed. We found the best way to do this is to mix it with Chocolate milk. We have narrowed it down to the part of her body failing her. While she is sleeping her body tries to maintain her blood sugars by grabbing onto her stored sugars and carbs from previous meals. Well Abby's body does not store any...so it starts breaking down other things it is not supposed to. Which in turn makes her body produce Ketones, after so many produce her body goes into ketoacidosis. Well the Ketoacidosis makes her throw up. So all this time we were thinking she was getting a virus and it was making her throw up and drop her blood sugars, when actually she is dropping those sugars at night and by the time she is waking up she is already in the Ketoacidosis phase and that is making her throw up. So we had it all backwards.

Now that we better understand what her body is doing, we are doing our best to prevent it from happening. The Raw corn starch releases slow amounts of carbs into her body through the night and allows her to maintain a semi steady stream of blood sugar. This has proven to be effective so far. We have had only 2 days of low blood sugar and 2 days of Ketones in her blood in the last 11 days or so.

For me though, I don't feel like it is good enough. I want to know what is causing it, and what long term effects it will have, and how long it will last. The Endo docs said there is 500 metabolic disorders it can be and testing can for all these can be exhausting. Their biggest concern is Abby slipping into a coma while she is sleeping from low blood sugar and us not knowing.

Abby has since started losing her hair, she has 3 balding spots on the top of her head and no one can tell us why. I just feel in my heart there is something more that is being over looked or missed.

I just wish we had a better answer.